called on the carpet

Whoa. I mean, WHOA. I should have posted yesterday, when the shock of it was still fresh. I've kind of gotten over it now. What happened, in a teeny-tiny nutshell, is I got in trouble for blogging about my job. L called R while I was at my other job in Munich, to tell him that Da Boss wanted to see us both thursday morning, but we had absolutely no idea what it was about. When he started talking about inappropriate things to say on a public forum I was floored. I think the URL is obscure enough that nobody would just stumble across it, and I Google my name occasionally just to make sure that there isn't any information about me floating around out there for anyone to see, so I figured it was private enough. But no. And then he said if I could just remove the bad bits, that would be better than bringing it before the whole JOB to be discussed and debated and freaked out over for the next few months - I thought that sounded like a threat, but R says it wasn't. So that's what happened.

And now, I don't know what to say about it. I've changed the names to initials, I've changed the uh, thing I work for to "the JOB", so that random people can't Google my employer or co-workers and be led right to my blog, which is what happened. Well, not random people; I have a guess as to who found it and tattled, and she was not someone I respected before. So I am annoyed, but not surprised, that she would do this, and do it in this way (calling the head Silverback, the cryptic summons, the threat to bring in the whole institution - why not just send me an email?). But still, there is the possibility that They are still monitoring this, and will find out what I think of Them and of the whole incident, and it shouldn't make me self-conscious, but it does.

And I'm not sure what I think. I waver between hilarity and mortification. On one hand, I am sorry for any discomfort or inconvenience caused, but they know as well as I do that the shit hadn't hit the fan yet, and any problems were only potential. In any case, I never intended to upset anyone. On the other hand, everything I put in the blog was true, and they knew I felt that way - admittedly, I was more diplomatic when I told them, but the message was the same.

So I dunno. I know some people have been fired for blogging about their jobs. I should be glad that didn't happen, though actually, that would be the least of my worries - for one thing, the actual work is occasionally fun, but the administrative garbage has been a thorn in my side for a good long time. For another, they probably know they'll never find another webmaster for €7,50 an hour, though I would dearly love to see them try.

Okay, that's it. It's been occupying brain space that I need for other things, so it's time to file it and forget it. If they decide to fire me, well, at least I'll be free of the bullshit.